MATTHEW 11:16 "But whereunto shall I liken this generation? It is like unto children sitting in the markets, and calling unto their fellows, 17 And saying, We have piped unto you, and ye have not danced; we have mourned unto you, and ye have not lamented. 18 For John came neither eating nor drinking, and they say, He hath a devil. 19 The Son of man came eating and drinking, and they say, Behold a man gluttonous, and a winebibber, a friend of publicans and sinners. But wisdom is justified of her children."

MARK 3:3:1 "And he entered again into the synagogue; and there was a man there which had a withered hand. 2 And they watched him, whether he would heal him on the sabbath day; that they might accuse him. 3 And he saith unto the man which had the withered hand, Stand forth. 4 And he saith unto them, Is it lawful to do good on the sabbath days, or to do evil? to save life, or to kill? But they held their peace. 5 And when he had looked round about on them with anger, being grieved for the hardness of their hearts, he saith unto the man, Stretch forth thine hand. And he stretched it out: and his hand was restored whole as the other. 6 And the Pharisees went forth, and straightway took counsel with the Herodians against him, how they might destroy him."

Are you beating your head against a wall trying to please someone else? Trying to be who somebody else thinks you should be? Trying to do what other people think you should do? Wouldn't you rather just be yourself?

Read the scripture above if you haven't already done so. Jesus compared His generation to a group of children playing a game. One group said, "We fluted to you, and you did not dance." The other group said, "We wailed to you, and you did not weep." John fasted and the Pharisees claimed he had a devil. Jesus did not fast and He was accused of being a glutton and a drunk. They just couldn't be pleased! They watched and waited to find fault with Jesus everywhere He went.

I have tried to please so many people for so many years, at one point I didn't even know who me was! Who was I? Did I even have a personality? I finally realized that I couldn't please all the people all the time. Seems I was always destined to be a disappointment to someone so I may as well just try to be pleasing to God and let the rest find fault where they would!

Every family has a fault finder. No matter what you do, he is going to find something wrong with it. No matter how hard you try, you can never please him. Seems like nothing you do makes him happy. I spent many years trying to please someone like that and then one day I just gave up. I got tired of always being disappointed when the expected praise or commendations didn't come. Seems like nothing I ever did was quite good enough for this person. They were always ready to tell me this, too! So, what do you do?


If you are trapped in the vicious cycle of rising up just to be knocked back down don't get up! Now, by that I don't mean stop being the best you can be but stop trying to be what others think you should be. You will never be able to please all the fault finders so why keep trying! It seems like when we don't please these people, when they find fault with us no matter what we do, the joy is just drained out of our lives. What gives them the right to take the sunshine out of our day! We do! We allow them to make our lives miserable. I have one person in particular in my life who I have never been able to buy a present that pleased them. No matter what I buy, they take it back, put it on a shelf or give it to someone else. This used to hurt my feelings until I finally realized that they were the one with the problem. It really wasn't about me at all. Now, I don't spend a lot of time on selecting a gift. I give them the present and tell them I have the receipt if they want to exchange it and I forget about it. I don't allow their reaction to hurt my feelings anymore. That way, they can get what they want and I have peace of mind!

We must give up on trying to please these people if we are ever to have any peace of mind! It is so nice knowing that I don't have to please anyone else to be a valuable person. I don't need anyone else's approval to validate my existance. If I am striving to please God and I am happy being who I am, that is all that is important.



Did you chose your occupation because someone else thought you should? Do you buy your clothes to please someone else? Are you trying to fit into someone else's mold? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you need to stop trying to be who others think you should and learn the joy of living free from the condemnation of fault finders. Jesus had people following Him around just trying to find something wrong with Him. He knows exactly how you feel. Talk to Him about this area of your life and ask Him to help you strive only to please Him and not let these other people keep you discouraged and disappointed with yourself. You are His creation and only He has the right to criticize you!




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